Breakups Suck

But ex-girlfriends who go from zero to slut in no time flat suck far more. I thought she would at least respect what we had, but clearly she's capable of moving on without a thought. Which sucks, because I know I'm going to be stuck in this rut wondering how many guys she's made out until I either find a new girl, or just become emotionally hardened to the point where she isn't an item in my mind.

I just don't understand how she's able to move on so easily. It's like she never actually cared to begin with. It's as if the whole time I was dating her, she was someplace else. I knew that the minute she joined a sorority, that we were on our way out. And then we broke up, and honestly, I was ok with that. But I'm not ok with her becoming a slut. I never will be.

I haven't heard from any more grad schools, but I think I know what I'm going to end up doing. I'm pretty sure I'm headed to UCSB next year, so I can just bury any memories that I had here. I can barely sleep in my own room because I keep thinking about her. It's horrible, and it's even more horrible because I know she doesn't care. As long as she has her "sorority" and her alcohol, she'll never think twice about dressing like a whore. And I used to believe that she wasn't the hookup type, but I don't really know what to think anymore. If you can change one part of yourself, you can change everything. And maybe she has. Maybe she's going to go through life with a hard heart and legs wide open. It just sucks that I'll always have to think that was what I dated once upon a time.